Stories, Thoughts and Snippets
Dependency 1 Dependency 2 Dependency 3 Dependency 4
The truth was I loved it when he initiated sex like that. When he took control. In the start it had always been like that, sometimes a couple times a day, if we were at home, or a friends, or even in a restaurant. He would drag me away somewhere, and I would love it. We were caught once, and it didn't matter, not to him and not to me. But, he didn't do that much anymore. We were still having sex every day, but it usually came in one long go rather than in a few stolen moments. And it never felt like he was forcing it, he would still initiate, but the feeling was usually that we both understood that the time for sex had come, whether at 1 in the afternoon, or 1 in the morning. We never had morning sex unless I demanded it, which I sometimes did. It just wasn't his thing, but it never really had been so I guess I cannot blame him.
It was the first thing that I'd seen that made me think maybe we wouldn't work out. So far it was the only thing, but I never doubted that more would come. They always came, even if it takes longer than expected. The sex was still good, and I suppose I couldn't really complain if it stayed the same, after all no healthy person can reasonably be expected to assault you every time a moment presented itself, shame though that may be. Perhaps what I needed was an unhealthy person. In any event, sex is important, no matter what someone may tell you, and if the experience continued to degrade eventually that would be all I needed to call it quits. I wouldn't tell him it was the sex though. I'd tell him it was the toothpaste, actually I'd probably tell him it wasn't him at all. I'd tell him it was me, that he was great and deserved better and I just needed something else.
"Now after something like that, how can you possibly doubt that I love you."
"I don't know. Demonic possession I guess. MMMm. God damn you feel good."
"Thank you. I moisturize."
"I don't think you moisturize here." He slipped his fingers inside me, which still felt a little good, I must admit.
"That moisturizes itself, thank you. So now then, what are you making me for dinner?"
"That's how it's going to be, huh?" He pulled away from me, drying his fingers on my pants that lie next to us.
"Ooh. Sad." He jumped up, rooted through the pile of clothes to find his underwear, and slid them up, as I started to collect my things he said, "I was thinking we'd order Thai food, I haven't had Thai in awhile.